When GM’ing a Dungeons and Dragons or RPG Game session nothing can bog down a campaign or the evening more than when a player who knows the rules to the letter better than the DM keeps trying to force the system and point out any errors the DM may make. One of the best things about a D20 system is its flexibility and a DM should vary from the rules to keep the game interesting and entertaining as long as the decisions made are fair and can be reproduced by everyone (players and DM alike).

When a DM varies from a rule in the player’s handbook or other guide, they DM should ask the player’s not to interrupt the campaign and argue about it, but all issues or concerns can be shelved for after the game. The DM can choose to permanently use the new rule or option that he introduced or if he agrees with the player, maybe some experience can be awarded for being so actively interested in keeping alignment with the structure of the rules.

When I used to DM I had a rules lawyer constantly challenge my variations early on, I made it clear that although my gaming was based on Dungeons and Dragons 3.5 Edition at the time, that I had taken the liberty of adapting some custom rules for my campaign. I had a clear published list of the various rules, and differences in my campaign, such as how I handled the healing and herbalism skills were very different than the core rulebook handles them.

I also did not hesitate to fudge a few die rolls for the effect of a story line, mostly these were in a players favor, I didn’t want a player killed by the enemy rolling a critical hit on the first round of combat, or I told a player that a saving throw was successful when the player really would have been a toasted marshmallow from the enemy wizards fireball.

All of this is to keep the game entertaining, interesting and keep your players coming back for more. In the end, the rules aren’t as important as keeping players and the game master happy and entertained for the few hours per week that they meet to game.

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Dungeons and Dragons can very quickly go from hobby to lifestyle.  The nature of the game very nearly demands it.

If you play on a weekly, or more often, basis, then you are committing as much or more time to the game as many people commit to the religion.  This means that it is a pretty strong commitment if you want to play and get to the full depths of the game.

Managing this kind of commitment can be very difficult, particularly for the more mature gamer.  If you are still in school, not working, not in a serious relationship (married, etc.), and have no children, then this is less of an issue.  If, however, you have a full time job, a spouse, and a few children; time, money, and the ability to justify the expenditure of said time and money to said spous and children can be in short supply.

Here are a few strategies for dealing with the problem.

1) Find gamers in similar circumstances.  This is not always possible, and you may have to travel a bit further, but really it is worth the effort.  These are people who will understand and possibly even tolerate your children.  In my group the kids all play together elsewhere while the adults role-play.

2) Don’t force the schedule.  Yes you do need to have a set time, but more importantly you need to be flexible.  Your group may want to play every week (or every day), but if you start treating it more importantly that your family they will quickly begin to resent it.

3) Keep the schedule you commit to.  Yes, a contradiction of the previous point, but not really.  What I mean here is that if you are committed, then explain that commitment to your family, and keep it.  Treat the game just as you would treat any other serious commitment.

4) Manage your budget.  This is important not just so that you have the extra cash for books and dice, but so that you can put the cost of playing in perspective for yourself and your significant other.  If you are shelling out $100 a month for D&D then your spouse may wonder where the diaper money went.  On the other hand, if you are paying attention to the money she (or he) may be a little more supportive.

5) Finally, include everyone.  Make time for the kids.  Explain the game to them in terms they can understand.  get them some cheap dice and let them play around.  They may not have your level of interest, but everyone wants to be included and feel like they are part of what you love.

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